humor

Rabbits Can Be Real Jerks…

thumper & appleNobody ever accused me of not giving others a fair chance to prove themselves.

Oh, that’s not to say I’ve not been burned a time or two (or a million), but I generally like to give people the benefit of the doubt before passing judgment. Maybe it’s an asset, maybe a character flaw – the jury is divided.

HH, who is a control freak naturally cautious of everyone, figures I need to adjust my methods, as outlined below.

Current formula:
COMPLETE TRUST + REASON FOR DISTRUST x ? = ACTUAL DISTRUST.
(Probably.)
HH’s proposed formula:
DISTRUST x 2 YEARS + TANGIBLE EVIDENCE OF RELIABILITY x 2 YEARS = EVENTUAL TRUST.
(Maybe.)

It can be argued that HH’s method, while a little scary in the early days for new acquaintances, has proven pretty successful. He has managed to safely eliminate any possibility of disappointment before granting anyone that greatest of all rewards,

THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT.

Whatever.

At any rate, naive trusting me, in the throes of one of my bleeding heart moments, decided that expanding the rabbit run in the front garden was just what I needed to do this morning. Poor bunnies, I thought – such a SMALL cage… so few toys… (there are about a hundred chewies, bells, balls with rattles, baskets of alfalfa, a pair of tunnels, one of which is edible, and a snuggle box full of  hay and with a bowl of pellets, fresh water, and a newly dried ear of corn ready for nibbling…)

It should be more than evident, given the above information, that my bunnies are seriously deprived, poor things.

No sooner did I put Thumper and Apple in their newly expanded run than the little so-and-sos decided to make yet another prison break. I had not counted on them playing velociraptor and testing the wire for weaknesses… but in the space of fifteen minutes, the clearly untrustworthy lagomorphs escaped! I’ve tried every trick in the book to recapture them, but they are as wiley as they are adorable.

HH has never for a moment trusted the bunnies with any degree of freedom, be that kitchen, sofa or cage. That’s because he’s a control freak smart.

Argh! I hate it when he’s right. And, for the record, rabbits can be real jerks sometimes!

Let’s see how a night under a rain-soaked hedge suits them…

Mother Hen

Feature Photo: Don’t be fooled by their sweet looks, my friends. These bunnies are pure evil! 🙂

© motherhendiaries 2015, all rights reserved.

Categories: humor, pets

Tagged as: , , , , ,

18 replies »

  1. This was so cute and funny. My oldest daughter has one singular bunny. He is able to show discontent and angrily shakes up his bottle and bangs in his cage. My two grandsons had a sweet bunny named Pinky and this one they named Beastie. He is really beautiful with all white with a small spattering of dark brownish spots. Hope he doesn’t catch how well yours are living in a palace. . . Until they plan their “prison break!” 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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